I’m writing this post on a Monday morning in October. I just dropped my daughter (Ava) off at school a little bit ago; we listened to Brown Skin Girl by Beyonce in the car. She’s been requesting this song a lot recently, so now it’s a staple in our morning drop-off ritual. I just finished eating breakfast, and I’m preparing to design a new website for my portfolio when I finish writing this post. This time last year, I was standing in a classroom at a charter school teaching science to a group of first graders. I had the undeniable privilege of molding young minds, teaching a subject I was passionate about, and providing a safe haven for my students. Being an elementary school teacher was a great fit for me in so many ways.

Until it wasn’t.

How did we get here?

This is a great question. How exactly did I get to this place where I’m now days away from officially launching my web design business? “How did I get here” has been a recurring question in my mind for the last several years. It took some honest reflection of my choices and actions for me to be real about WHY I was in a particular place in order to have the courage to take the next right step to get to where I wanted to be.

That’s exactly what this post is about; it’s another opportunity for me to look back as I move forward and embrace my next chapter. I hope it encourages you to reflect on your current situation and take YOUR next step when the time is right.

Pieces that don’t always fit

Ava and I love doing puzzles together. She’s also obsessed with the show Bluey (what 5-year-old isn’t?). When she got a set of Bluey puzzles for Christmas last year, we were both on Cloud 9. When we build a puzzle together, our shared excitement grows as we start to see the image come together. Being 5, Ava still sometimes pouts or whines a bit when a puzzle piece looks like it should fit well into a particular spot, but it just doesn’t work there no matter how much she tries to force it.

For a long time, I was that piece struggling to fit into a picture that no longer aligned with my values. Teaching, once a passion, had started to feel like a mismatch with the life I wanted to create for myself and my family. As much as I genuinely valued the work I’d been doing for 15 years, I was beyond drained. I gave my best hours and energy to my students every day, and I had almost nothing left for my husband and daughter (or myself) when I walked through the door every evening. I found myself desperately counting down the days to the next holiday or break (sometimes even before a break had officially ended). I began moving from one role to another in my school literally trying to find the right fit. Kindergarten teacher, mentor teacher, school administrator, curriculum writer, science teacher–it didn’t matter what I did. My mental, physical, and emotional health were all suffering; I wasn’t the best version of myself anymore. As someone who has a high standard for how she shows up in the world and serves others, this was a hard realization to make.

Building my own puzzle

Just as Ava learned that some pieces belong in different spots, I realized that I needed to step back and reassess my situation. Instead of forcing the pieces together, I took a leap and crafted my own puzzle. I started by leaning on one of my most sacred values–that education opens the door to possibility. I was, after all, a teacher. I started by taking online courses in the evenings and on the weekends. I learned copywriting, website design, and some basics of running an online business. I thought I’d been drained before, but after I started to take online courses and build a side hustle, I was now running on E. While I was excited about the future possibilities that would come from owning my own business, side hustling was another puzzle piece that just didn’t fit. I wanted a career beyond classroom education, but I didn’t want to sacrifice my sanity and time with my family to get it. In early 2024, I told my principal that I would not be returning the following school year.

Leaving my school was incredibly bittersweet. After 13 years in the same school building, I’d forged deep friendships with other staff members and had lasting bonds with students and their families. It was difficult to imagine no longer walking through the doors of a place I felt like I’d grown up in. I also knew I’d be shedding a major part of my identify: teacher. I had been a bright-eyed, bushy-tailed, 24-year-old teacher newbie when I first walked through the doors of that school building. I left as a 37-year-old wife, mother, and aspiring business owner. I’ll forever be grateful to the people I grew close to during those years. And yet–it was time to move on.

Where to from here?

Several months after that decision, I’m even more committed to building that puzzle that resonates with who I am as a wife, mother, and professional–one that fits seamlessly with my life and allows me to thrive in ways I never imagined. I now spend my days designing websites, learning about how to effectively use social media (still terrified but I’m going to do it anyway), managing the behind-the-scenes of my business, AND connecting with my family. I sing Beyonce with my daughter in the morning, read Piggie and Elephant books with her after school, and lie down next to her as we say our prayers each night. I binge The Mole with my husband before bed and talk about our days as we devour cookies and argue about whether the crunchy or soft cookies taste better (I’m Team Crunchy Cookie all the way). I look forward to the weekends to recharge, reflect, and reset–not escape. I start my work days excited about the projects in front of me and all that I’m learning. I experience moments of doubt on an almost daily basis, but I’m driven by my determination to create a life that feels beautiful and free. I hope you’ll stay with me on this journey and continue to read about the ups and downs I encounter as I forge a new path.

If you made it this far, thanks for reading and coming along for the ride.

<3